I'm not a great patient
I'm not a great patient. I expect things to turn around much quicker than they do. During my first chemo I met another patient who was sharing her experience with me and one thing I heard her say is that she always takes Monday & Tuesday off from work following treatment, well I thought to my self, I shouldn't need that. I have the weekend and then I should feel fine by Monday. Hahaha... one thing I'm learning is that I'm not actually in control of this whole process. Which if you know me at all is not sitting very well. I'm a little bit of a control freak, some of you should stop laughing so hard. I know it's true and I'm learning to deal with giving over control to God. "Learning" being the main word there.
Anyway, Monday & Tuesday have been hard. Still feel like crud and really want the good feelings to come back. I am walking moment by moment and still looking for every positive in every moment.
Some positives from today... my parents are willing to come sit with me whenever I need it. Even if it's just "I don't feel well and shouldn't be alone" reasons. And my kids are amazing kids who jump in and help when ever I need them too, even when they really don't want to. And my husband is a rock star who is putting up with way more from me than I think he realized he'd have to when he said "I will." And when your friend sends you a song via text because she is thinking about you and it makes your heart remember to "trust".
Praying for tomorrow to be better!
Anyway, Monday & Tuesday have been hard. Still feel like crud and really want the good feelings to come back. I am walking moment by moment and still looking for every positive in every moment.
Some positives from today... my parents are willing to come sit with me whenever I need it. Even if it's just "I don't feel well and shouldn't be alone" reasons. And my kids are amazing kids who jump in and help when ever I need them too, even when they really don't want to. And my husband is a rock star who is putting up with way more from me than I think he realized he'd have to when he said "I will." And when your friend sends you a song via text because she is thinking about you and it makes your heart remember to "trust".
Praying for tomorrow to be better!
